"What is the best way to deal with passing gas? Pretend it didn't happen? A polite ‘Excuse me'? Bail out early on plans? Please advise"
First of all, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure--if you know that certain foods make you gassy, try to avoid them if you can when you know you’re going to be in a social situation. But if you’re stuck with gas and a crowd of people, here are a few thoughts:
- If you can hold it in without causing yourself medical distress, then try to keep it contained until you are in a better place or situation.
- Excuse yourself and go to the bathroom, even if it is just to pass some gas. This is thoughtful of other people and less embarrassing for you.
- If you absolutely can’t contain it, then excuse yourself, but do so discreetly.
- If your emission is odorless and silent, then you might do well not to call any further attention to the situation.
- If it’s silent but deadly, you might consider the humorous approach if it is a casual setting, and relieve the tension by excusing yourself and blaming the non-existent dog.
- If it’s too late for discretion and it’s an informal group, you could add a little wit when you excuse yourself, saying something like, “Please excuse me, in addition to Jupiter and Saturn, it seems I’m another gas giant.”
Mr. Manners’ Quick and Dirty Tips for a More Polite Life.
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